Frikkin' frakkin' triathlon

I'm really going to be glad when this race is over.
Don't get me wrong- I'm thrilled to be doing it, and I expect to love it and want to do more, blah blah blah. It's just that part of me doesn't want that. I want my workouts back! I'm tired of having to swim when I don't want to or being guilted into a bike ride. There's this huge amount of guilt and shoulding with all my workouts. Plus, now that it's beautiful out, there's the guilt of wanting to go outside, but I'm paying for the gym, blah blah, oh, won't I shut up.
It's sucking my desire to be active.
AND I'm having nervous dreams and just generally being on edge.

Grrrrrrrrrr.